Nonfiction

Group: How One Therapist and a Circle of Strangers Saved My Life

Group: How One Therapist and a Circle of Strangers Saved My Life

  • Downloads：9395
  • Type：Epub+TxT+PDF+Mobi
  • Create Date：2021-06-03 23:31:05
  • Update Date：2025-09-06
  • Status：finish
  • Author：Christie Tate
  • ISBN：1982154624
  • Environment：PC/Android/iPhone/iPad/Kindle

Reviews

Lucinda ，

I gave this five stars because I approached the book as an entertaining read with a strong self-help message。 And that’s exactly what it delivered。 It reads like a work of fiction - it reminded me of Girl Interrupted。 It’s totally gripping - hilarious， tragic， cringeworthy but also insightful and profound in parts。 It made me think very deeply about my own life。A lot of reviewers have commented on the ethics of the techniques and strategies employed by Dr Rosen given that this is a true story。 T I gave this five stars because I approached the book as an entertaining read with a strong self-help message。 And that’s exactly what it delivered。 It reads like a work of fiction - it reminded me of Girl Interrupted。 It’s totally gripping - hilarious， tragic， cringeworthy but also insightful and profound in parts。 It made me think very deeply about my own life。A lot of reviewers have commented on the ethics of the techniques and strategies employed by Dr Rosen given that this is a true story。 These things never crossed my mind whilst I was reading， but in hindsight I can see how it raises a lot of questions。TL:DR It’s a warts and all confessional of a high achieving professional young woman working through with her attachment issues to overcome her fear of intimacy。 If this sounds like you， then I think you will get a lot out of reading it because it’s touching， poignant and incredibly insightful but also comedic， cringeworthy， dramatic and gripping。 I would recommend reading as I feel like it saved me a lot of time and money I’m not going to group therapy！ 。。。more

Amy Dillon ，

This is a hard book for me to rate。 The book， for me， was certainly hard to put down （or turn off， as I listened to the audiobook）。 But it was usually in the same way that it's hard to look away from a car crash。The writing was strong。 The story was interesting—to a point。 At first I found the author sympathetic。 The Hawaii trauma， which seemed to be the root of so many issues， was truly heartbreaking。 Her self-doubt and struggles connecting with people was relatable， to a point。 Most of us have This is a hard book for me to rate。 The book， for me， was certainly hard to put down （or turn off， as I listened to the audiobook）。 But it was usually in the same way that it's hard to look away from a car crash。The writing was strong。 The story was interesting—to a point。 At first I found the author sympathetic。 The Hawaii trauma， which seemed to be the root of so many issues， was truly heartbreaking。 Her self-doubt and struggles connecting with people was relatable， to a point。 Most of us have made similarly bad choices in dating at some point in our lives， though there were definitely times when I was like "seriously？？"But most of my "seriously？？"s were saved for group therapy itself。 While I could certainly see the benefit of sharing secrets to take the shame out of them， the insistence that every detail be shared often made me squirm， and sometimes had my jaw on the floor。 The author's tantrums in group got old。 I started to wonder， along with her， why things weren't changing， but probably not in the same way she was。Some of it—especially the therapist's "prescriptions" — seemed wildly inappropriate。 I was glad that the author found support， friendships， and the ability to connect through her group， but I couldn't help but think how damaging it could be。 I find myself recommending the book to friends less in a "this book is so good" way， and more of a "I need you to read this so we can discuss how bonkers it is。" 。。。more

Jen McIntosh ，

I didn’t enjoy this one。 I had a hard time relating to any of the characters。

Mia Shenkman ，

If you’ve ever been curious about the ins and outs of group therapy （how does it work？ what do you do？） this Incredibly raw and emotional memoir is for you。 I found myself relating to Christie， the author， who suffers from her loneliness and realizes that her inability to feel uncomfortable feelings is the root of her empty relationships。 Also—it was fun to read about high powered lawyers world in Chicago and how the profession so intricately weaves in with mental health。

April ，

Nope。 By the umpteenth f word I was done。 Read 10% maybe。

Bonnie ，

Can’t decide what I REALLY think。 Not at all like my experience with group therapy。 But。。。I was compelled to root for her， and obsessed with finishing。

Aron Reina ，

Read this for our book club monthly selection。 We chose it partially in jest （"Let's pick a self help book！"） and partially to encourage conversation。 I believe this book meets both objectives， and meets them extremely well。 That said， this is not my favorite read， nor do I agree with the treatment methodology described therein。***********Spoilers*************I really strongly disliked the focus of the book， though I did enjoy the view into this woman's mindset about sex。 If she's even 10% accur Read this for our book club monthly selection。 We chose it partially in jest （"Let's pick a self help book！"） and partially to encourage conversation。 I believe this book meets both objectives， and meets them extremely well。 That said， this is not my favorite read， nor do I agree with the treatment methodology described therein。***********Spoilers*************I really strongly disliked the focus of the book， though I did enjoy the view into this woman's mindset about sex。 If she's even 10% accurate about female inner-thinking， then this is eye opening。 That's important for men to know， and for women to discuss - at least it is in my progressive mindset。That said， I felt the therapist was very Western， focused on pay-for-solution control， rather than treating the underlying issues。 The therapies felt contrived， and even after writing this whole book， I'm not sure she really understands what changed， nor why。 That's disappointing to me as I'm not sure she really changed anything， nor that she really is healthier as a result。But， again that's why it's a great dialogue starter。 So， for a book I didn't enjoy， I will admit， this is a conversation we all need to be having。 How to have safe， healthy and effective relationships。 From that perspective， this goes from a book I didn't like， to a book I find necessary。 。。。more

Kayleigh Schmidt ，

So many bad reviews but I loved this book and I love therapy and I love love， what can I say 🤷‍♀️

Becky ，

This book was terrifying and heart wrenching， and by the middle it turned into a thriller and a root for the good guy story。 The beginning was scary because we all know someone with mental illness， and when their world looks so bleak and hopeless， it causes fear for that person safety， and ache for their frame of mind。 By the middle of the book I was really wanting to cheer for Christie， I was frustrated with some of the advice， and I was anxious to know how things were going to turn out， while This book was terrifying and heart wrenching， and by the middle it turned into a thriller and a root for the good guy story。 The beginning was scary because we all know someone with mental illness， and when their world looks so bleak and hopeless， it causes fear for that person safety， and ache for their frame of mind。 By the middle of the book I was really wanting to cheer for Christie， I was frustrated with some of the advice， and I was anxious to know how things were going to turn out， while still feeling her pain。 I liked the debrief she gave at the end， and bringing the book back to current times and her "normal"。 At the beginning I really did not like this book， because of the negative emotions it brought out in me， it was not a relaxing read。 But the second half I enjoyed the human interest story。 Though we all know mental illness needs more attention， and no one suffers alone， to the person who is fighting these battles it is a very lonely place。 I liked the real characters， the patients who turn into her friends。 I enjoyed her honesty and her journey- and the hope she spreads。 I will read more books by her。 I recommend it， but you must have a strong heart。 3。5 stars。 。。。more

Rachel ，

I was not a fan of this book。 So much so that I stopped reading less than half-way through。 Usually I finish a book even if I do not like it， but this one was just not possible。

Erica ，

Though I appreciate the author’s honesty and vulnerability and am glad this form of therapy worked for her， this book was absolutely not for me。 I was very uncomfortable throughout the entire book （both in describing certain events of her life and what happened in group） and I did not agree with many of the actions， comments， and “prescriptions” made by her， her group mates， and her therapist during her group sessions。Therapy is a wonderful thing that should continued to be normalized and destig Though I appreciate the author’s honesty and vulnerability and am glad this form of therapy worked for her， this book was absolutely not for me。 I was very uncomfortable throughout the entire book （both in describing certain events of her life and what happened in group） and I did not agree with many of the actions， comments， and “prescriptions” made by her， her group mates， and her therapist during her group sessions。Therapy is a wonderful thing that should continued to be normalized and destigmatized， but I do not personally recommend this book， especially for those that have never had any sort of therapy before and may think that all therapists and practices are like the one the author attended。Many trigger warnings needed for this book including suicidal ideation， eating disorders， witnessing death， and self-harm。 。。。more

Donna Callaghan ，

This book shows that there are many different kinds of families！ It was very well written， thank you Christie Tate for sharing so much of yourself！

Aimée Challenger ，

I loved this book。 It shows the power of human connection and therapy！ I loved the way she talked about everything from eating too many apples to the intimate parts of her life with the same open heart。 Made me think of Brené Brown in parts。

Nicole ，

Did not like this book at all。 Struggled to get half way through and then stopped

Caroline ，

This book was enjoyable enough to read， but it wasn’t quite what I expected。 I like memoirs and reading parts of someone’s journey， but some of the choices made in this book felt questionable （or maybe I just couldn’t relate 🤷🏻‍♀️） and the oversharing of sexual details bumped it down a few notches for me。

Rebecca Valdez ，

This book is about a young woman with childhood trauma who needed to go to therapy to function in society。 It was satisfying to see how therapy helped her work through her trauma， cope with food addictions， and build bonds of trust with members。 I do agree with the premise that keeping secrets does more harm than good even when they are not about yourself。 The book ends up being similar to Sex and the City about half way through。 A young successful woman sleeping around Chicago while her group m This book is about a young woman with childhood trauma who needed to go to therapy to function in society。 It was satisfying to see how therapy helped her work through her trauma， cope with food addictions， and build bonds of trust with members。 I do agree with the premise that keeping secrets does more harm than good even when they are not about yourself。 The book ends up being similar to Sex and the City about half way through。 A young successful woman sleeping around Chicago while her group members and therapist talk her through it。 The group members and therapist are entertaining personalities。 Nothing ground breaking， average writing， but amusing。 。。。more

Amanda Lombard ，

"If you're serious about getting into intimate relationships - becoming a real person， as you said - you need to feel every feeling you've been stifling since you were a kid。 The loneliness， the anxiety， the anger， the terror。"I wasn't sure this would be my kind of book but I really enjoyed it。 Funny and honest and I even cried at the end。 "If you're serious about getting into intimate relationships - becoming a real person， as you said - you need to feel every feeling you've been stifling since you were a kid。 The loneliness， the anxiety， the anger， the terror。"I wasn't sure this would be my kind of book but I really enjoyed it。 Funny and honest and I even cried at the end。 。。。more

Kate Sullivan ，

Kind of an odd book in my opinion。 Could have been an awesome concept but it wasn’t my favorite read。

Jill Bliss ，

I liked the emotional journey through this book。 And I liked the message that we need to be honest with each other and we need support。 The only thing I didn’t like was the graphic details into her sex life。 While it was brutally honest， and that’s what therapy is all about-I just didn’t care for it and didn’t think it was needed。 I would love to hear this story from the perspective of her therapist because much of the time I could not understand what he was doing and trying to accomplish！

Patti ，

Not my usual but worth the read。

Molly Gregory ，

Very much enjoyed reading of the author’s unconventional （？） experience with group therapy。 I found myself always coming back for more and will continue to think about the concepts of shame and secrecy because of this book。

Maddy ，

Slightly draggy around the first half of the book。 Second half is much better as you see the character really take shape and the ups and downs she goes through。 Gives a positive light on what therapy can do for a life when the chemistry is right。

Ashton Granger ，

Amazing read， I was hooked and couldn’t put it down

Sharon ，

A raw and honest account of the author's transformation through group therapy。 Teaching her how to have relationships and cope with setbacks。 I just read a book about the stoics and there approach is the anti-therapy approach - to be grateful for what we have instead of grasping。 A raw and honest account of the author's transformation through group therapy。 Teaching her how to have relationships and cope with setbacks。 I just read a book about the stoics and there approach is the anti-therapy approach - to be grateful for what we have instead of grasping。 。。。more

Amanda Meyer ，

Okay so not gonna lie， this book was very hard for me to get through。 At times I thought I could never relate to anything more and at others I was bored and struggled to get through a chapter。 Overall I did enjoy this book and it made me think a little deeper about what is going on in my own life。

Danielle ，

I am honest to god about to give up on this book。 I picked this up right after reading Maybe You Should Talk to Someone， which I absolutely loved。 Especially being about group therapy， I had high hopes that this book would be a deeply captivating memoir where you learn about the different lives of the people within this group， the internal struggles that they all individually face， and how they all lean on each other for support。 Unfortunately， this was… not so much that。 It was not all warm fuz I am honest to god about to give up on this book。 I picked this up right after reading Maybe You Should Talk to Someone， which I absolutely loved。 Especially being about group therapy， I had high hopes that this book would be a deeply captivating memoir where you learn about the different lives of the people within this group， the internal struggles that they all individually face， and how they all lean on each other for support。 Unfortunately， this was… not so much that。 It was not all warm fuzzies。 In fact， it was pretty obnoxious and self-centered。 Despite the title， “Group” primarily centers around Christie and her own relationship problems that she’s going through over the course of the book while the group members are basically just the people who are there to listen。If the group is involved， it’s usually the other group members’ responses to her various trials and tribulations that she goes through。 The book barely goes into the other group members’ lives at all beyond just barely mentioning their issues before jumping right back into the “main story” of Christie’s problems—certainly not deeply enough to allow us to form any kind of attachment。 It’s sort of just like， “Oh yeah， Carlos has this problem， Marnie struggles with this… Okay， now back to Christie’s boy problems。”While reading this， I also couldn’t help but find the plot to have this almost Alice in Wonderland feel to it where Christie falls down the rabbit hole of group therapy and from there wanders upon different groups along the way， but any time she tries to reason with anyone and try to make sense of the strangeness around her or how it’s supposed to help her， they reply with some vague bullshit or just say some cop-out like， “Oh， but it IS working” yet refuse to tell her how？？ So it just became this long winding tale of Christie joining different groups， jumping from one relationship problem to the next， going through this sort of trial and error of various suggestions from Dr。 Rosen in the quest to get to the root of her intimacy problems， only for nothing to stick。 With this， the plot was also so repetitive。 I just felt that the same things were happening in a cycle over and over:Step 1: Christie is faced with a new relationship problemStep 2: Christie takes it up with the group and Dr。 Rosen， who “prescribe” her a solutionStep 3: This solution doesn’t appear to have the results Christie wanted。 Alternatively， Christie is in desperate need of Dr。 Rosen， who is unreachable by phone。 Step 4: Christie verbally assaults Dr。 Rosen on his voicemail… And tha- that’s it。 This copy+pasted four times is basically the book in a nutshell。 After seeing this same pattern repeat over and over， it just grew unbearable to keep reading。 Not only that: Christie is just such an unlikable person I mean， there’s the obvious fact that Christie is so unhinged that any little inconvenience or not being able to get in touch with Dr。 Rosen at any time in the day results in her flying off the handle and screaming at him， reaching the point of literally pulling out her hair in a fit of rage。 But even putting that aside， she’s just a generally unlikeable person in my eyes。 She’s abrasive， she’s self-centered， and certain comments she made would rub me the wrong way。。。 including the way that she talks about sexuality in this book。 HOO BOY。 Firstly， in the beginning of the book she compares herself to being “borderline asexual” to describe her inability to form sexual intimacy in relationships， which… yes， that can be a sign that you’re asexual， but in this case it wasn’t。 She was just a regular straight woman experiencing difficulty connecting with men in her relationships， but otherwise her sexual attraction to men didn’t change。 Either way， asexuality should not be synonymous with your own relationship woes。 You may as well pull the ol’ “Ugh， I’m tired of dating men who are terrible。 Maybe I should just switch to being a lesbian。”But then later in the book， she begins dating this guy who has his own struggles with sexual intimacy while she herself is desperately wanting to have a sexual relationship with him。 She starts to feel embarrassed when she opens up to the group about it and feels “infantilized，” comparing those who are in sexual relationships as “adults” while she feels like a child。Girl。STOP。 EQUATING。 SEXUALITY。 TO。 BEING。 AN。 ADULT。STOP FLIPPANTLY USING ASEXUALITY TO DESCRIBE YOUR RELATIONSHIP ISSUES WHEN YOU ARE NOT ASEXUAL。Okay， so that’s Christie， and I would argue that most of my complaints about this book are about Christie， but there is an unsung hero in this book who also annoyed me， and he goes by the name of Dr。 Rosen。 Okay。。。this therapist was like the freakin’ Willy Wonka of therapists and it was absolutely infuriating The entire time I read this book， I could only picture Dr。 Rosen as Gene Wilder， smiling cheekily whenever Christie would look to him for help during group or when he would dole out his outlandish assignments like telling one of the group members to hold an Adderall between her toes while allowing her husband to go down on her or ordering Christy to tell the guy she likes （who is in a relationship， by the way？？） that she’s a cock tease。 He just had this giddy， eccentric personality that irritated me to the point where I couldn’t even take him seriously anymore。 His practices as a therapist are also… questionable， to say the last， and I hated the way he seemed to manipulate the situation while not fully being direct with Christie regarding his motives or how this was supposed to help her when she just wanted a straight-forward answer。 Everything seemed to be in riddle， and Dr。 Rosen appeared to get absolute joy out of this， which struck me as incredibly unprofessional as a therapist。 A great example right off the bat of Dr。 Rosen’s manipulation and lack of straightforward communication: At the beginning of the book when Christie first joins group， everyone hugs at the end of the meetings and Dr。 Rosen tells Christie， “We usually do this，” without offering her any other option。 So she goes along with it。 It’s only later at another group that she discovers that she could’ve refused to hug anyone when another group member verbalizes this。 And like… just the fact that a therapist would manipulate a patient in this way and not properly communicate with her that she has a right to set her own boundaries and that she can decide for herself whether she wants to hug other people。 I’m sorry， that is unethical。 Some people genuinely do not like being touched， and they have a right to that。 Not for you to frame it that they have no other option because “Oh， we usually do this。” It was at this moment that I already did not trust this dude， and you know what？ My instincts were correct。 On a similar note， the way that the groups handled anonymity and confidentiality （spoiler alert: they didn’t） made me really uncomfortable。 Now， I’m not a therapist nor have experience with group therapy， so I don’t know the proper protocols， but it seems kind of unethical that the group isn’t considered anonymous or even held within the group and that group members can freely talk about someone else’s issues outside of the group。 When Christie rightfully expresses her rights to privacy， the group only twists it into some psycho babble about not carrying shame on your shoulders and that keeping secrets is harmful。 And like， yeah， I get that， but also… she still has a right to privacy and for her own personal struggles to stay within the group？ Like， y’all in the group are absolutely toxic for gaslighting her and acting like she’s the selfish one for wanting a right to privacy… damn。 （**Side note: apparently you’re also not allowed to express an emotion longer than two syllables because after that it’s “intellectualizing” and veering away from the truth？？ What kind of actual bullshit is that that？ So any feeling that’s longer than two syllables isn’t an emotion？ LOL ok。 This doesn’t particularly relate to anything。 I just needed to note this。 That is all）And now that we're at the end of this review， after having spent some time with my thoughts on everything that drove me mad about this book， I really don't think I have the strength within me to keep pushing forward。 I'm at like 60% but getting to that point felt like a decade and I just。。。 I can't do it anymore。 At this point， I don't even care how it ends and I have a very strong feeling that the pay-off is not going to be worth it。 I have absolutely zero emotional investment in this book， and it's just a bummer that this was such a let-down compared to Maybe You Should Talk to Someone because I really did think I was going to love this。 But I think I'm just going to have to let this one go and DNF it。 。。。more

Ashish Vyas ，

Very frank and vivid description of authors own experience of life's ups and down and how she could come out from she'll and helped others a bit。 It can help one to understand how psycho-therapy works。 Very frank and vivid description of authors own experience of life's ups and down and how she could come out from she'll and helped others a bit。 It can help one to understand how psycho-therapy works。 。。。more

Ms。 Ikonge ，

I relate to Christie and honestly the last few pages had me crying like a baby。 I don't know what else I can say。 4。5⭐️s I relate to Christie and honestly the last few pages had me crying like a baby。 I don't know what else I can say。 4。5⭐️s 。。。more

Mary Byrne ，

I found this memoir a hard read， but never once did I consider not staying until the end。

Holly ，

Obviously， this was not a hit with me。 It was。。。too much。 Too much oversharing。 Too much sex。 And the therapist？ He felt a bit unethical to me。 Although I cannot argue because his methods did seem to work with the author。